exactly where you are

Once upon a time...

we received the good.

"Accept it all and let it be for good...

"This moment's pulse, this rhythm in your blood...  Stay with the music.  Words will come in time...

"And when the heart is full of quietness, begin the song exactly where you are."  Malcolm Guite

Amen, and thank you, Jesus.

Why has my flow of thankfulness been punctuated by cursing and anger?  Lament and desire for remittance?

That is where I begin-- exactly as and where I am.  I love you, and sorrow, and find myself in the middle of age-old friendships and betrayals.  I take my stand FOR the good.  Help me to embody that good, the kind that forgives and reconciles and tells the good truth.  God, make me salt water and fresh water.  Make me foam when I break against the rocks.  Make that breaking spectacular and salty like my language, fierce and proud, and ethereal and fluid.  Help me to retreat and regroup and re-assail.  Make me fresh water that receives from above and below the essential life giving liquids and reflects the clarity and light of the firmament.  Your ways are so, so good and wonderful and loving and beloved and clear and light and no darkness at all.  You tell us what will happen before it happens.  You give encouragement and warning.  You call for truth and justice, for those are your ways.  You delight in mercy and in unity, and you call us to persevere, to expend ourselves, towards those ends.

Thank you for late night talks with Rob, for his desire to understand the words I am not saying, for his love.  Thank you for the mercy it is to find comfort in him.  Thank you for how unity requires perseverance, and is able to open our eyes, and challenge us to challenge and repair the disunity all around us.  Help us to be unifying forces, and love you dreadfully.